Normally, I start the holidays saying I'M going to stay zen and peaceful, but then I start piling on tasks and buying over the top gifts- it spirals from there. My health always.....
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It’s scary stuff, and yet so many put their mental health on the line every day to stay longer at the office, finish that project and earn that promotion. Work is often to blame for the worst stresses of modern life, and when you throw social pressure into the mix, it makes for a nasty recipe.
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It's time to take my power back. It's time to give myself permission to move forward. Enough of feeling powerless and hopeless. I wake up frustrated and feeling defeated. Also, I have been jealous of everyone's everything lately, a sure sign that I'm feeling stuck and need to change things- drastically, if possible. Josh agreed to be with me in sickness and in health. Right now, it's sickness but I want to go back to health.
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I hand my unhealthy self a bottle of water and take away the can of pop she's holding. The first small step, I indicate, without words. My unhealthy self nods in silent agreement and gratefulness. I hug my unhealthy self in a warm embrace. "I'm here for you," I whisper, "I'm always here for you".
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Why would mania be a struggle, it’s the “happy” part of bipolar disorder right? Essentially, yes. Words synonymous to mania are passion and enthusiasm- unfortunately, lunacy and craziness are also synonyms. Deep in the throws of mania, I’m an emotional “yes man”. My inhibitions are lowered and I’m craving socialization, so nothing sounds like a bad idea. I am incapable of checking myself. Mania can create some of the saddest moments of the illness.
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INFJ personalities account for less than 1% of the population. It stands for Introverted, INtuitive, Feeling and Judging. This weird mix of traits means that an INFJ often feels like an outsider. Since INFJ are intuitive introverts, they can feel they are one step ahead of everyone and an observer. They can use their keen observational skills and “spidey senses” of feeling to intuit what you are going to say or do next. Yeah, it can be a little creepy, which is why they can feel that you don’t love that. Which makes them feel more like an outsider. An…
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Whether it’s because of a tragedy or just to help you get through your day, I strongly believe that no one should be ashamed of seeking mental health help. Therapists and psychologists can be invaluable to your well-being. Your pain is your pain. As Christine says in the movie, Lady Bird: “Different things can be sad….it’s not all war!” If you can’t get out of bed in the morning because everything feels too much, you may want to reach out to a psychologist or therapist. BetterHelp can help you decide which one you need and hook you up with one…
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You know what I love? The idea of taking care of yourself. The idea of loving yourself, body and soul. Sometimes the soul needs a helping hand and sometimes that helping hand is online therapy. I haven’t tried online therapy myself, yet, but the idea fills me with calm. I have, however, been on-again, off-again with therapy and counseling since I was in my early teens. Whenever I have a particularly rough patch, I go back to a therapist to help me through it. My first bout with therapy was when I was 14, after a failed suicide attempt. It…
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I have never been the best sleeper. I think it is because I get anxious at night- I always have. This cartoon explains it perfectly: Usually those thoughts crop up when I am in that hazy place between asleep and fully awake, which means that as I am about to drift off or just as I am about to wake up, I go to a very unhealthy place, emotionally. And if life is good? (Which it usually is now). My mind will make something up or think of something from years ago! Did I chew my food too loudly…
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I feel a little jangly today. My stomach feels off, probably from all the sugar in the apple crisp last night (worth it!), or maybe all the socializing, and my muscles are sore from working out. We had a busy weekend and now I feel “hungover” of sorts. I get like this after a big weekend. (#introvertproblems) Except for my workout classes of cardio ballet at Ballet Barre Works, I will probably hibernate from other social obligations this week. I will focus on housework things that I have been ignoring, like changing sheets and finishing laundry. I will pet my…