eight years ago.
pasta and potatoes at every meal
empty pockets; only food that fit my budget.
in a new city, needing a rebirth,
living out of my suitcase,
on the wrong side of the tracks.
early mornings, up to catch the train.
i watched drug deals happen and turned my face
against the icy Spring wind that was trying to freeze me;
wondering what I was thinking.
hustling on the phone to
pay my rent, pay my debts.
convinced by the eclectic crowd to
grow to love the city,
to learn to love the night life.
the introvert in me
wanted to scream- not out of fear.
i left the house.
with the stars out,
with the sun ready to rise,
its yellow head peeking up,
rubbing the night slowly out of its way
with its yawning rays-
it’s then i met you.
you walked in to my life
in a wide brimmed hat,
swatting away invisible bats.
i complimented your costume-
your staying in character.
in admiration, i quoted Fear and Loathing and
you kissed me.
the stars sang as they went to bed that night,
winking at us,
my heart stumbled
in to yours.
blurred from practicality
we felt the earth shift beneath us
so we held tight to each other,
arms wrapped around, we wouldn’t fall off the edge.
but we did fall: deep.
only feeling, only touch, raw emotion.
we felt and saw and wanted only the other person,
a universe of two people, orbiting each other with touch, with
…conversation, with quiet looks.
kissing mouths and laughter on hikes,
late nights and early mornings
blurred in to each other.
our eyes met and our earth shifted,
life didn’t feel like a hustle
but an orchestra; and all of the
instruments in tune.
the sun smiled on us and the earth blessed us
with another life that bonded us- stronger.
suddenly we were three.
our lives created a new life.
i met you. my heart glowed. i
looked at my hands and i knew they had changed and
my life would never be the same.
the very fabric of me changed: i felt it as an audible noise.
as if i walked through an invisible door,
and it clicked shut behind me, an older version of me
i can tell you the exact moment my
life changed with that click of
my heart’s door.
the stars winked; they knew it too.