So it has been a hard week or so.
Josh’s 30th Birthday went by quietly. His mother showed up for a surprise visit and we went out for dinner Thursday night, Vietnamese. I felt bloated and awful that night and most of the next day but ignored it. Friday the 20th was Josh’s birthday. We played games and watched the World Cup. That night my Mother-in-law stayed to babysit and we went out for drinks with a couple true blue friends. One of my fave people, Shanna, came too. We talked each others ears off until after 1 am! It was really nice. Josh got to see his very busy friends, the two that were able to come out. Very nice way to usher in the third decade of his life I think.
But then Saturday. I most definitely could not ignore my stomach any longer. It was hard Friday but impossible Saturday. I spent most of my time Saturday in the bathroom. The worst part is I still felt like I was dying on Sunday and then a teeny better Monday, but not by much. Pepto Bismal did absolutely nothing. Kaopectate helped a bit. I won’t bore you with the gory details but it was bad. I basically put on movies for the kids and lived in the bathroom. I had zero energy. Finally on Wednesday night I went to the Dr. at my local walk in. I got one that was so attentive! He acted like he had all the time in the world for me! He listened to my heart, my bowels, did my blood pressure….etc etc etc. We talked a lot on what the specific symptoms were and when they started. He finally concluded that his suspicions were that I have infectious colitis. I won’t try to explain it, but here is a link to explain it better than I could:
Basically it is from food poisoning that persists but isn’t a life long illness, rather an infection that can be fought. (Although I have heard that I can’t be confirmed to have colitis until I’ve had a colonoscopy, so maybe it IS just a flu. I am just reporting what the doctor said). He gave me a general medication to “slow my system” so that I could actually digest the food I was eating before it rushed through me. I was to keep taking Kaopectate when needed, get re-hydrated (he noticed my skin has no sheen and was becoming less pink due to dehydration), and get a lot of rest. If it continues I will probably need a colonoscopy. But the medicine seems to be slowly doing its job! Hurray!! Normal life, here I come again.
Other than that is the Izzy situation.
The past few weeks the kids haven’t watched anything scary on tv. I think the scariest thing they have seen is probably the Lego Movie. Yet, for the last couple of weeks Izzy has had a recurring nightmare. If I ask her to describe it she starts hyperventilating it is so scary. She won’t tell me, even in the middle of the afternoon. All I have gotten out of her is that it’s a group of “bad people” who are chasing her and circle her and won’t let her escape. Now she wants to be tucked in 7 times and has 700 excuses to get out of bed. Her door needs to be open and the bathroom light down the hall left on. She has a great imagination this one. Too good. I remember having nightmares that were so scary that I would be too afraid to get out of bed to get mom and dad, in case I was snatched by the bad things on the way there. I used to have a recurring dream of a witch that would follow me and cackle on her broom. She would sometimes catch me and throw me in to a tiny room in her house, scratching my face with her long greenish black nails. The scratch was a spell or a poison. My skin would shrink on my body until my skin was suffocating me and strangling my organs. I would be just about to die, with her circling the house and her continuous chilling cackle filling my ears….and I would wake up. I think this dream started in grade 2 and went to grade 5. So to say I understand Izzy is an understatement. She is so sensitive like me. Sometimes I worry that she is fragile emotionally like I was and I worry that I won’t be able to arm her with the tools to stay strong and become stronger every year. She is a dreamer and sensitive and can be quiet. She is quick to get emotional and leads with her feelings. She gets attached easily to things and people. All of it is all too familiar. I hope that I can be a help to her through my experiences and through empathy and strong parenting. I hope she becomes a little warrior of life without losing optimism and hope. My little Warrior Dreamer. So today I came up with an idea that my Grandma did for me once. We will make dream-catchers. The concept is such a comforting one and may help her feel empowered to control her dreams and soothed enough to get some sleep. Here’s hoping!
** UPDATE to this recent post. Today my stomach is rapidly getting better so the meds ARE working. Also, yesterday Izzy made her very own dream catcher from a dollar store kit and even though it is as awkward looking as it gets she loves it and slept ALL the way through the night last night. Little victories folks!
<3 <3 <3 <3